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Fight for Your Right

May 6, 2010

This week was declared “Right to Read” week at school, which just so happens to coincide with a book fair at the school.  I’d like to find out the owner of this brainchild, because this person has inflicted serious mental anguish for me.

Even though I’ve already laid out $30 to buy books, each morning, I’m forced to endure pleas for more money.  I’ve learned from past experience to not give into these pleas because it ends up with the kids bringing home marked up equivalents of Happy Meal toys.  I still haven’t figured out how scented markers and pocket pets encourage a love of literature.

In addition to playing ATM this week, I’m supposed to dress up my children according to each day’s theme.  Monday was dress like a waiter day.  The instructions were simple enough–wear a white shirt, black pants, and an apron.  But things are never simple in my house and dress like a waiter day caused a huge morning meltdown.  After having four kids, the one thing I have learned is to never buy white shirts, because they only stay that way for about 30 seconds.  I was scoffed at for suggesting they wear mostly white t-shirts inside out (It’s not wear your t-shirt inside out day, Mom!).  Then there was the whole apron fiasco.  I was shocked to find that I had two aprons, since I quit cooking years ago.  But, nobody wanted to wear the plain green apron covered with remnants of past baking projects or the freebie TiVo one.

The next day was Crazy Sock day with the instruction of wearing unusual socks.  Again, you would think this is simple enough.  But, after a quick sock check, I decided that all of our socks were usual.  One kid decided that dress socks were unusual (he’s my new favorite).  The other one went with mismatched baseball socks, and the third went with usual socks of different colors.  This was the least stressful day of the week.

Wednesday was 50/60’s day, where we were instructed to dress up in clothing of those decades.  Unfortunately, I was fresh out of poodle skirts, leather jackets, and hippy duds.  I would really love to tell you what they wore to school yesterday, but the stress of the week fried my brain resulting in a bad case of CRS (can’t remember sh*t).

Today was Class Color day, with each grade having a special color they had to wear.  My 5th grade boy had to wear purple.  Since purple is my favorite color, I had many options.  I started pulling out all things purple.  He did not want my Shake it Freely t-shirt or the sparkly butterfly shirt. The gigantic cocktail ring and my favorite handbag were also shot down.  The only other option was my rubber Alzheimer’s bracelet, and after a 15 minute interrogation on anything else I might own that was purple (the only other thing I had was the bra I was wearing), he reluctantly agreed to take it. The twins had to wear yellow.  Luckily, my daughter had a yellow Taylor Swift t-shirt that my sister-in-law bought her.  I should probably send her a token of my appreciation.  After several loud sighs, rolling eyes, and a lot of yelling, I still was not able to find anything for the other twin.  While he was upstairs, I spotted his sister’s school t-shirt shoved in a corner of the living room.  I grabbed it and yelled “I found a gold t-shirt!”

I have never been so happy to see 7:15 A.M. in my life.  I put the kids on the bus and came inside for some peace and quiet.  It was then I noticed the Right to Read letter that listed each day’s dress up instructions.  Tomorrow is Community Spirit day, and students should support the school by wearing school colors.  I can already see what the meltdown tomorrow is going to be about…

So, a big thank you to the Right to Read peeps.  You’ve filled my week with morning fights and beggary.  You’ve turned happy kids into unsatisfied, grumpy brats.  You’ve driven me to substitute Bailey’s for Coffee-Mate.  And if I ever find out WHO you are, I’m throwing the book at you.


2 Comments leave one →
  1. Dena permalink
    May 12, 2010 10:01 pm

    Shake it Freely purple tee shirt. Awesome.

    • May 12, 2010 10:57 pm

      It’s not as freaky as it sounds, LOL. It was a local band…Jakob Freely. But I love the looks I get when I wear it, sooo 🙂

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