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Working 8 to 5

May 30, 2012

So, I’m a working girl now. I don’t know what in the hell I was thinking when I thought it would be a good idea to get a full time job with 4 kids — oh wait I know exactly what I was thinking – it’s summer break and I need out of the fucking house all day…but I digress.  I’m a working girl with 4 kids so I barely have time to take a piss anymore, which I might add is becoming a rather tiresome task considering my aversion to public restrooms.

Anyhoo, I must ask a question. How do you working mothers do it? Where do you find time to clean the house, do the laundry, cook dinner, pay bills, and make all the stupid phone calls you have to make every day? And for the love of God and all mankind, how do you get people to fix and/or deliver things after 5 p.m.? How do you not fall asleep at the little league games or while standing at the stove cooking dinner? OK, maybe I had more than one question…

Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy to be working.  I was craving some adult interaction that didn’t involve telemarketers and my brain is happy is not wasting away anymore, but I haven’t quite found my rhythm yet so everything besides the new job is suffering. Or at least I hope the new job isn’t suffering – I still have a couple of months til the kids go back to school.  Hopefully, my potty mouth won’t get me fired before then.

Unless you have some better suggestions, I’m thinking I totally need a sister wife.  Or maybe just a wife period.  Are they close to legalizing gay marriage yet? I don’t know because I can’t stay up late enough to watch the news anymore. Oh and could someone give me a Cliff Notes version of what I miss on Facebook every day? Any by the way, would someone be nice enough to sit at my house between 1 and 5 p.m. to let the exterminator in and make sure the handyman fixes my door knob?  In exchange you can have the stale cream sticks I bought at New System Bakery since I’m working downtown and can pick them up anytime I want them but am too tired to actually eat them.

I probably had more I wanted to say but the couch is looking way too good right now. It’s a sad day in my world when the couch looks better than the bottle of Grey Goose…


8 Comments leave one →
  1. May 30, 2012 9:19 pm

    Most working mothers that I know do not work 8-5. They work, 6-3 or 11-7 or some other shift that still leaves them time during the day to get all of that other shtuff done.

  2. May 30, 2012 9:39 pm

    The last sentence brought a tear to my eye. Surely nothing is better than Grey Goose, or in my case, Belvedere. Which reminds me . . . .

  3. May 31, 2012 2:29 am

    So what’s the job? I can’t wait to hear your analysis of your co-workers!

    • June 2, 2012 10:22 am

      Legal assistant…in a very small office, so no sharing! LOL

  4. Dusty permalink
    May 31, 2012 5:58 pm

    Make out a Chore List for the Kids! Kids these days have it to easy!

    • June 2, 2012 10:23 am

      Done! Hopefully my washing machine will survive the summer.

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